Nothing Is As It Seems

We are creatures of the Mystery are we not? And our world is a manifestation of that Mystery. Yet we also give the Mystery reality. And more often than not we make it into what we want it to be. Or believe it to be. Simply through our perspective. For we are creators. Through the wonder of imagination… the thrill of romance ….. the pull of expansive vision…. the allure of glamour… the subtle touch of the numinous ….. the magic of love…. the opening of compassion…. and also through the projection of our own self beliefs, concepts or judgments. Yet how much of what we see is really real? Maybe reality is recognising that reality is whatever we choose it to be? Down the rabbit hole anyone?

Pisces is the zodiac sign associated with infinite realities and unlimited possibility. There’s been a strong focus on this sign in the first few months of this year. The recent Mercury retrograde through February and March has offered us the opportunity to explore the mystery of dreams, imagination, vision and spirituality, yet also our own unique version of reality. This Pisces season is being consistently energised by the long-term journey of Mystic Neptune (Pisces ruler) through its own sign (2011 - 2026) and now by the presence of dark feminine Black Moon Lilith from 3 May to 27 January 2020.

What is Black Moon Lilith? Like the sign of Pisces, she’s a mystery. In astrology there are four Liliths - Asteroid Lilith, Dark Moon Lilith (a rarely seen potential second Moon to the Earth) the Lilith star, Algol, and what I’m speaking of here, Black Moon Lilith - a point in the universe related to the orbit of Moon and Earth. This Lilith oscillates its position through the zodiac over a period of eight years ten months. Astrologically she represents an alchemical process held by the dark feminine. It concerns the integration of our light and darkness, spirit and matter, our Being and the dark layers of our shadow. Black Moon Lilith calls us beyond the beyond; she calls us let go of self and express the numinous, to express our true genius in a human body. She’s a gateway for the Sacred Feminine. Her journey through Pisces is the final phase of this latest cycle that began 23 March 2011.

Pisces is the sign that represents the ocean of consciousness; it’s about soul connection, vulnerability, compassion, forgiveness and trust. Black Moon Lilith in Pisces opens the door to some of our most sensitive inner spaces, with a potential for opening deep compassionate connectivity and sublime feelings of beauty. The need to fully express on a feeling level is strong in Pisces; psychic sensitivity is extremely high. This placement challenges, and may catalyze, any resistance we have to deeply feeling. With Black Moon Lilith in Pisces we are opened - sometimes despite our self - to be profoundly moved by both beauty and pain. Or we begin to deeply recognise where we cut off from feeling, becoming alienated from our deep self and others.

Pisces is the sign of unconditional love and unity. It’s where we yearn for the Beloved and yet may deny the vulnerability needed to open that space. Black Moon Lilith’s journey through this watery sign reveals both the yearning for love and our refusal to go there - for there are guardians at the gate of our soul’s potential for deep sweet connection. These guardians at the gate don’t look pretty. They comprise our resistance to our own vulnerability and tenderness, our culture's denial of the sacred gifts of the Divine Feminine and our rage at that dishonouring. Black Moon Lilith brings awareness and the potential for healing magic to these wounds wherever she plays. If we are willing to walk with her in Pisces we are called to fiercely face the guardians we have placed above our vulnerability; the shadows of our deepest fears, self-rejection and shame, our mental beliefs and judgments about those deep raw energies. It’s a layer cake with hard frosting yet deep sweetness as its core. To reach the sweet deep we need courage, fierce commitment and trust. The question is trust in what?

Trust is a Pisces quality; it’s the highest trust. Trust in the numinous; trust in the unseen, the unknown; trust that we are truly held; trust that truly nothing is as it seems. As we commit to eating the frosting and digesting the layers that Black Moon Lilith reveals - our own self-betrayal and our rage at our culture’s denial of the Divine Feminine and ourselves as women - we penetrate the guardians at the gate, the self’s defences. We begin to recognise that the energies we’ve judged, that we’ve refused and projected as unacceptable, that we’ve hidden, the places we’ve been ashamed, humiliated and exploited, are fuel for the fires of the soul’s expression. As we fiercely face our hardness and defences with the gentlest Piscean qualities of compassion and unconditional love, we open the sweetness of soul. Paradoxical? Yes! For Black Moon Lilith is the paradox. She represents our deepest shadows, our brightest light, the sweetest vibration beneath pain or rage. Black Moon Lilith asks a great deal of us; she’s disruptive; she’s inconvenient to our left-brained plans and our preconceived beliefs. She insists on attention when we least want to give it. Most of all in Pisces she demands (a good Lilith word) that we trust the light of the unseen whilst we embrace our darkness. She insists we keep penetrating the layers of what we perceive to be 'reality' in order to discover truth at the core. This requires vulnerability… the vulnerability of openness …. the vulnerability of openness that is truly our greatest strength.

Vulnerability as strength? Is this really true? Well, we have to go there to know this. For the proof we feel we need is in the eating. Vulnerability may seem defenseless – and it is. Yet within that exposure is a core power that is the truest security. For the openness of vulnerability enables true response. In that place, the Real opens. We know Truth and we are called to express it. Black Moon Lilith is real, sometimes shockingly so. To our small self such raw openness is confronting; it’s certainly not comfortable. Yet it’s truly refreshing; it’s profoundly opening and transformative. It opens the gate of the soul. Black Moon Lilith in us knows that nothing is as it seems. What we most resist is the place of the gift. She calls us there..... into the deepest recognition that everything is Life ... and into the acknowledgment of our responsibility for what we create with Life.

Key awareness for this process:

Trusting your intuition, knowing, visionary capacity, sixth sense.

Keeping life simple. Recognising confusion, about anything, and letting it go.

Staying out of victimisation, paranoia. Recognise not everything is about you; people have their own lives. Not feeding the mind with negative imagination, fantasy or projection.

Facing and embracing your insecurities and self-disconnection.

Viewing life as a movie that we potentially get caught up in.

Cultivating presence, being here now.

Body practices that support openness and flow: yoga, dance,

Quiet time and retreat; aloneness

Good quality rest and sleep

Key Questions:

What opens you to the experience of beauty, magic, soul connection, bliss?

Where/how do you experience deep emotional connection? To your self? To others?

What practice – spiritual, soulful, artistic, creative – opens you up? Commit to consciously making space for it.

What habits of closure do you have? What triggers closure? What kind of experiences, people or places do you avoid?

What numb-out habits might you have? Food, drugs, alcohol, co-dependency, over-working? What’s really behind them? What might you be trying hard not to feel?

What might you need to forgive? Of your self? Of others?

Read more about Black Moon Lilith

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